


Dirty Dirty

by Theincrediblesulkmachine



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Bisexual Keith, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), F/M, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Goes badly, I heard a song and did a thing, Keith (Voltron)-centric, Keith is a fantastic singer, Lance messes up a little, Lots of drinking, M/M, Meh, Minor Allura/Shiro (Voltron), Minor Hunk/Shay (Voltron), My writing muse ignored all my other WIPS for this, No consent issues, Oblivious Lance (Voltron), Oblivious Shiro (Voltron), Pidge is done with her oblivious friends, Pining Keith (Voltron), SHEITH - Freeform, Some characters only mentioned, Song fic, THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE LIGHT GOD DAMN IT, These boys are bi buddies, Try and pry that headcanon from my cold undead hands, Unrequited Love, but its literally the driving plot point, hardly anyone knows, he's so adaptable, i am apparently incapable of not writing angst, i cant do romance, i dont know how to explain myself, idek, if you havent listen to steven yeun singing, implied shallura, its more emotion related than anything relationshippy?, its more serious than the summary makes it sound, its unintentional, karaoke night, keith has the sad, lance's pov is fun to write, like booooooi, one sided sheith, only in implication, or college related?, shallura - Freeform, shrugs, song is pretty relevant IMO, theres nothing explicit except the pining and occasional swearing, well kinda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-04
Packaged: 2018-12-23 23:27:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12000168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theincrediblesulkmachine/pseuds/Theincrediblesulkmachine
Summary: The sweetest part was that today was the day Lance would finally one-up Keith in their never-ending prank war- and his plan was flawless: drinks at their usual hangout, and once everyone was proper smashed, karaoke night.Add an ever-ready smartphone to the mix, and he would have Keith making a fool of himself on camera for eternity.





	Dirty Dirty

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys, 
> 
> Since i apparently also have zero impulse control, (i get you, Keith) here we are: some 3k words of pining Keith, singing about his misery, and oblivious Shiro, and Lance realizing he may have made a mistake.
> 
> Its not particularly about relationships, but more the emotions behind them and its primarily in the implications.
> 
> The song that inspired this is particularly lovely: Charlotte Cardin- Dirty Dirty. Listen to it [here](https://youtu.be/H1zmgRBPLCU) or this [alternate remixed version](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEbhZtyGkOM) (i basically just played it on repeat all these hours.)
> 
> The lyrics/ Keith's singing is in bold, underlined font, kinda hard to miss since i even formatted it differently. That is not my writing (obviously enough). Everything else is.  
> Okay, so i hope you guys enjoy this; and i'm just going to... hide.

* * *

All in all, Lance was very pleased with the way the night was shaping up; He’d managed to get his hair just right, he’d found his favourite pair of jeans with ease and it made his legs look _fantastic_ \- which honestly was a remarkable feat; his legs are _great, thankyou very much._ He was wearing a brand new sleeveless tank with a glittering sequined shark emblazoned across his chest- which was just _awesome_ \- and he’d managed to get all his friends agree to being dragged out.

Despite how long it had been since their last meet up, it had taken some finagling, honestly; Pidge had grumbled and grumbled, when they finally deigned to answer their ever-ringing phone; Allura had huffed and mentioned, ‘ _a ton of work, Lance’_ and Shiro had tried to convince him, _‘It’s a Sunday, we are not_ all _immune to hangovers, Lance.’_

To which he had responded with: ‘Server-gate’, “ _Shiro_ will be there’ and ‘ _Allura_ will be there’. 

They all shut up pretty fast after that.

 _Ha_.

Hunk was honestly the angel of the group, agreeing with no protests like Lance had known he would, even if only to stop Lance whining at him.

(Lance loved him so much.)

The surprise had been Keith, who he’d run into at the parking lot outside the gym, looking frankly terrible.

Which, _weird_ , but not unheard of. Keith Kogane was a moody individual.

“Keeeeeith~ bar tonight?” Lance had asked, running towards him to catch his shoulder, smartly choosing not to comment on his wrecked appearance.

Keith had only blinked at him once, as if it took him a second to place Lance after emerging from particularly deep thought.

Shit, those were horrid dark circles. Lance mentally tsked to himself; _wasted potential, honestly._ “You in?” He prompted, not entirely unused to Keith and his moods.

He sucked in a breath, and with a hand pushing the hair out of his face, “Yeah, yeah I’ll be there.”

_Sweet._

But the sweetest part was that today was the day he would finally one-up Keith in their never-ending prank war- and if it helped pull Keith’s head out of his ass? Well win- _win_.

Plus, he wouldn’t be expecting it.

So, yeah. Lance was looking forward to it.

And his plan was flawless: drinks at their usual hangout, and once everyone was proper smashed, _karaoke night._

Add an ever-ready smartphone to the mix, and he would have Keith making a fool of himself on camera for eternity.

Lance could feel his grin widening, drunk Keith was more likely to take him up on his dumb dares, and he wouldn’t see this coming.

Boy, he was pumped.                                    

He made sure he was at the bar before everyone else, made sure to promise Nyma extra tips if she could keep Rolo from making the karaoke announcement before time, allowing that honour to be bestowed on Lance himself. (and also play _the_ song when it _was_ time)

And then Lance was all set, so he grabbed a table closest to the stage, and waited; hopping with nervous excitement.

Predictably, Allura was the first to arrive- punctuality as much part of her as that cute accent. She looked gorgeous, as per usual, and Lance wasted no time in wolf-whistling in sincere admiration.

“Hello, Pretty Lady.” He winked ostentatiously, and was rewarded by a small pleased grin, and a wide roll of the eyes.

“Hello, Lance.” She sat, straightening out an imaginary wrinkle from the glittering silver dress that set off her complexion in beautiful ways, and merged into the luxurious tresses of her white hair.

Smart, beautiful and sparkling in sequins, it was no wonder that when Shiro walked in, his mouth dropped open just a little, and he gaped momentarily. He was too much of a gentleman to keep at it, but the flush high on his cheeks was endearing as he slapped Lance’s shoulder in greeting and hugged her before taking the vacant seat adjacent to hers.

Lance couldn’t blame him; Allura was a goddess.

However it was much harder not to laugh as Allura blushed, and they both exchanged shy glances. (It was made much easier laugh when the evil- _EVIL_ \- beautiful girl stomped on his foot.)

Hunk was waylaid by Shay as he arrived, and was currently flushed from his hairline to his chin, as the sweetest couple-to-be on the planet exchanged words. Lance waved cheerily at them, well into his second drink- a fruity pink concoction that tasted like watermelon and summer- and they waved back.

(Lance shipped them so hard.)

The little gremlin known as Pidge was nowhere to be found, and Lance was pouting, wondering if the two grumps had ditched when Keith strolled in and froze.

He looked positively stricken.

 _Weirder than usual,_ Lance registered a little fuzzily, but waved his victim over with excitement _._ “ _Keeeeeith, my buddy, my man. You maaade it.”_

Keith seemingly startled back into awareness, hand raising in a half wave then dropping to scratch at his neck. His hair was tied up, and he was in almost-Goth levels of black; simple black dress shirt, untucked, black slim-fit jeans.

He still looked effortlessly devastating, and Lance couldn’t help feel a twinge of bitter envy when a couple of girls tittered as he passed by them, not even sparing them a glance as he stopped at the bar ordering his drink.

 _Hmph_.

“Don’t pout, bud.” Hunk ruffled his hair alongside a sidearm squeeze as he slid in next to Lance, leaving the chair open for Shay.

Lance felt better enough to plaster a beam back on, which only widened when Hunk returned it.

Keith still hadn’t made his way over, pushing back two shots in quick succession at the bar counter itself, before grabbing a glass of his favoured old-man whisky and then finally sitting down with them.

Lance was beginning to wonder if his plan would be easier than he had dared to imagine.

“Hey.” He was unreasonably stable being two shots in and halfway through his new drink.

Lance pouted at his crushed hopes, but waved at him.

“Keith!” Shiro greeted pleasantly.

Keith darted a weirdly wary glance at him, but smiled a tad helplessly before sitting next to him.

“Keith, it’s wonderful seeing you again. It’s been a while.” Allura said, ever charming, leaning across Shiro to greet him. (Lance valiantly stewed only a little at how nice she was to him, and ordered another fruity concoction)

Keith didn’t quite meet her eyes as he half-heartedly smiled again, opting to swish his drink around. “Yeah. Uh, no Pidge?” he asked, chancing a quick look around.

“Nope.” Lance said, popping the ‘p’ and slurring a little.

Keith’s face fell marginally, but Shiro captured his attention with a gentle smile and a hand to his shoulder, and Keith turned to him almost inevitably- like clockwork, like gravity- and Lance found himself wondering if it had always been this way; because his brain- maybe not entirely there brain- was picking up _signals._

 He was maybe a little shook, as he looked askance at Hunk, who shrugged a little before turning back to Shay.

A little niggling feeling at Lance’s head wondered if his plan was a good idea after all, but then his better judgement was lost in the excitement of the arrival of the new tray of drinks. He shrugged, thinking it couldn’t be too bad if Hunk wasn’t making a fuss, and as he pulled at his glittery green drink, he forgot.

* * *

 

This had been a bad idea.

This had been a _very bad_ idea, but in his defense Keith hadn’t realized that when Lance was inviting him out, he had meant _everyone._

He should have known _, god damn it._ Should have made an excuse about studio or a deadline and just _not gone_ , but he had thought the night of drinking would do him good.

As precedent would state; he’d get into dumb shit with Lance, who’d needle at Keith and pull him into some harebrained scheme to get a date with whatever girl- or guy- struck his fancy, and then he’d try to wingman _Keith_ into a lay with the girl _or guy_ that they were with, and he’d be able to get _it_ out of his fucking system, out of his self-inflicted misery.

 _It_ being the sun-sized crush Keith had apparently decided to harbor on Shiro, his long-time bestfriend.

Not only was Shiro way out of his league, he was oblivious to Keith making cow-eyes at him.

And as of late, utterly smitten with the gorgeous Allura.

Stupid, _typically_ stupid _fucking_ Keith.

Now he was here, nursing his umpteenth fucking drink of the night and still feeling far too sober for the cuteness surrounding him.

_Should have stayed home._

Keith wanted to gouge his eyes out rather than see how nausea inducingly perfect they were together; all model good looks and shy smiles and fleeting touches and _unfuckingbearable_ flirting. He sounded _bitter_ , and to an extent he _was_ \- but he was happy for Shiro, really… he truly was.

Gods knew the guy deserved all the best in his life, but Keith was just miserable and angry with himself, and very very much a maudlin drunk.

If it also felt like a sledgehammer to his chest every time Allura’s hand brushed Shiro’s, a taser to his heart every time they laughed together, ensconced in their little private bubble; well, that was no one’s business but his own.

Keith turned to Lance desperate for a distraction before Shiro managed to pityingly pull him into a conversation- he could see the warning signs in Shiro’s glances at his sullen disposition- to find him already looking at him with scrutinizing blue eyes.

 _Shit_.

Keith tried valiantly not to flush, and jerked his head at Lance as if asking him why _he_ was staring.

Lance in the surprisingly perceptive manner that Keith had come to appreciate about him, just smiled almost-sympathetically, and whooped loudly, unsubtly and threw an arm around Keith, making him jerk and splash the remnant of his drink and several ice cubes out onto the table.

Okay maybe Keith didn’t appreciate it _all the time,_ but the objective was the same.

And it worked.

Just like that Shiro was distracted, amused at Lance’s behavior, laughing at whatever snide comment Allura made.

Keith sighed and slumped a little into Lance’s side, who had seemingly lost that flash of intuition, back to being his irritatingly cheerful, cuddly drunk self.

Keith filched the glass from Lance’s hand and gulped it down amidst halfhearted protests from the Cuban. It was sweet but oddly strong and it numbed the lump in his throat a little.

(Keith might have also taken advantage of Hunk’s preoccupation to down whatever was in his glass. It still wasn’t enough)

Lance stuck both hands up in the air signaling to the gangly, dreadlocked bartender for another round, and then climbed up onto his chair.

“Ladies and _ge-germs_.”

Hunk was the only one who laughed, and Shay smiled a little into her glass. Allura groaned and thumped her forehead onto Shiro’s shoulder, who in a rare display of aware bravery, slipped an arm around her shoulder.

“Might I have a-” Lance hiccupped, swaying a little, and Keith grabbed his leg to keep him from toppling over onto him. “Moment of your trime- _time_.”

Keith was hyper aware of how Allura’s groan turned into a grin, and Shiro beamed, and he just wanted to crawl into a hole somewhere, just to not have to deal with himself and the curdling in his gut.

Was that really so awful of him?

“Today” Lance gestured grandly “Is the most _aush-picious_ of days”

Keith really was a _piece of shit, wasn’t he?_ What kind of person wouldn’t be content with the person they _loved_ being happy.

“Its karaoke night!” Lance yelled, and the room erupted into drunken hollers and applause.

Keith heard nothing over the pounding of his heart in his ears.

Oh _fuck_.

Love?

Oh fuck, no.

 _Love??_?

_What the fuck?_

It was supposed to be inconvenient attraction, lust, a crush… not this. Not _THIS._

“And the first volunteeeer is my little emo buddyy, Keith Koganeee.” Lance finished with a loud whoop, and Keith zoned in to his name, and Lance jumping down and shoving him forward.

Wait, what?

“What the fuck, Lance?” Keith hissed, stumbling when the liquor finally hit him.

“it’s karaoke night, my dude, and you’re up for the first category: _Sultry Soul.”_

Keith dug his heels in, but Lance just laughed and kept shoving. “Whats the matter dude, you _chicken_?”

And Keith was an idiot, but _everyone_ was staring and he was desperate to get rid of this weird restless itch under his skin, and he had zero impulse control especially when drunk and Lance was goading him, so he pushed his sleeves viciously over his elbows and slammed his glass into Lance’s chest and stalked over to the stage.

Lance just cheered, unfazed. “Go get ‘em, you little Vixen you!”

Keith paused uncomfortably when he was on the stage, looking out at a room full of strangers waiting expectantly. His gaze inevitably hit Shiro, who smiled encouragingly, and Allura cheered right along with Lance and the rest of the crowd.

He felt conscious suddenly, and his heart sank straight to his combat boots.

But then the dreadlocked bartender was queueing the music and the sharply beautiful girl with all the piercings that he was always with, was handing him the lyric sheet.

Keith glanced down, and realized he _knew_ the song.

The beat flickered out, a slow breathy pulse, and Keith laughed a little.

It was mirthless, bitterly ironic.

Fate was a _bitch_ , and so was Lance.

But Keith had never backed down from a challenge in his life, and he wasn’t going to start now.

* * *

 

Lance was so ready, his phone was poised, and the video was running as Keith looked down at the lyrics and laughed.

It was a sharp sound, and Lance’s brow furrowed a little, uncomprehending.

It was a sexy, wistful song, and Lance had picked it because he couldn’t imagine Keith being able to carry the emotion without self-combusting- the guy was basically perfect, and socially awkward to boot; he couldn’t imagine Keith singing about an unrequited heartache; let alone one from the girl’s point of view.

Actually, he couldn’t imagine Keith singing, period; hence the video camera.

Lance forgot his concern almost instantly- attention span timing out- and perked up as Rolo pressed play.

_ “I see the way, I see the way you want her,” _

Keith breathed in, and the sound that came out of his mouth hit Lance like a bucket of cold water.

It was low, a little raspy, and honestly, devastatingly sad.

Lance almost felt sober all of a sudden.

* * *

 

 _“I see the way,”_ Keith sang on an exhale, voice shaking the slightest as the room went deathly quiet.

_ “I see the way, the way you want her,” _

How ironic, the song was literally his life; he saw, all too clear, just how much Shiro was enamoured with the elusive _her_.

_ “You're not easily impressed _ _,”_

He’d hardly ever seen Shiro be like this with anyone, but Allura was hardly just _anyone_. Intimidatingly beautiful, and confident; talented. She was truly a class apart; a true match.

_ “Baby, I got more under my dress, but you won't twitch.” _

Keith was losing himself, to his thoughts, to the haunting lilting beat; when was the last time he had sang in public? He had a decent voice, he knew, he’d once even privately entertained the idea of a band with a couple of other art students, but it had fallen through when he realized how much attention it would gather.

_ “I see she's got, I see she's got something I don't.” _

Understatement; what did he have that she _didn’t_?

Keith wasn’t the seeming reincarnation of some ancient goddess; he wasn’t the sole heir to one of the most prestigious families around- he wasn’t from _any_ family really;

He wasn’t anyone of much importance really, just a weirdly motivated kid with some talent, from a random orphanage who nearly got himself kicked out of uni three times a week.

_“ You know I'm jealous in my head”_

Keith _was_ , intensely burningly jealous, of Allura, of the light in Shiro’s eyes when he looked at her.

He hated it, he hated himself for it.

When had he become that _petty_?

_“ Cause you'd look so good in my bed”_

The forbidden fruit; the thoughts Keith had never let himself entertain even momentarily, because he would die before objectifying Shiro like that, and if he ever did, he would go half-mad from the siren call alone.

It had lingered still; flashes of dreams, of fantasy, of gentle smiles turned wicked; glazed hoarfrost eyes fixed on him, only him.

_ “But you really like the **bitch.** _ ”

He couldn’t help the slight venom, the emphasis that slid into his voice with that little reminder, and he laughed just a little, helpless as his eyes drifted like clockwork, like gravity to Shiro.

His slate grey eyes were on him, mildly concerned in an absent-minded way, but it was dwarfed by the crinkling amusement on his lips, and then he wasn’t even looking at Keith, he was looking at Allura whose mouth was open in pleasant-faced surprise

And Keith hated her, hated _him_ ;

Except he couldn’t, he _couldn’t._

_ “So I can cry for my age, my life and my face,” _

Keith closed his eyes, unable to look anymore, unable to parse; his head was finally spinning with the alcohol, and once more he tried to convince himself to let go.

_ “And I will wash off all the dirty, dirty thoughts I had about you,” _

_Let_ him go, let _him_ go, let him _go_.

_ “And I can cry cause I got so much she has not,” _

Yeah, like his delusions; his need to be wanted, to be _needed_ , to belong somewhere.

_ “And I will wash off all the dirty, dirty thoughts I had about you now,  
Wash off all the dirty, dirty thoughts I had about you” _

A flash of twisted longing curled in his stomach, and Keith slipped into silence as the stanza ended, drawing in breath that sounded too shaky, too uneven to his own ears.

He couldn’t find himself enough to stop, to take his crumbling pride and get off the stage.

He never did know when to quit.

So he kept baring his heart to the boy who wasn’t listening.

* * *

 

Pidge had gotten late, so she jogged double-time trying to make it before Lance got too pissy. She could not risk “ _server-gate_ ” as he had dubbed it, getting out;

Keith wouldn’t ever let her hear the end of it.

The bar was crowded; too crowded for normal ratios, and as she did a quick mental calculation, she heard the waft of live music and groaned.

Karaoke.

_Lance._

But Katie “Pidge” Holt was no quitter, so she braced herself for tone-deaf drunks and slid open the door.

The voice she heard was unmistakeably not tone-deaf, and distinctly Keith, and she skittered to a halt a bare few steps in.

_ “Maybe I'm young, maybe I'm too young to understand this, _

_ But you're a mess in your own ways _

_ Let's mess it up together, babe” _

His star-glazed galactic eyes alternated between shut, and unhappily fixed on Shiro; from the way he was standing, as if the mic stand was the only thing keeping him from falling to his knees, Katie knew he was more than a little drunk- enough to be feeling it.

(The rest was indicated by the fact that he was willingly singing in front of half of the city, it seemed, about things sober Keith would go to his grave denying)

_ “I'm what you need.” _

And then his voice cracked a little, and he laughed softly, and Katie couldn’t bear the sheer quantity of emotion he was unwittingly let trickle through.

It was haunting, and heartbreaking lovely, and she could feel goosebumps prickle her skin.

_ “Who could I, oh, who could I be just to get to you?” _

Oh, Keith.

_ “You should be ripping off my gown _

_ Turning me on, you just send me down, down on my knees _

_ Pretty little tease.” _

Pidge finally tore her eyes off her aching friend, to find a gaping Lance filming the entire scene, and stomped her way through the crowds unerringly precisely- the people stepping aside to avoid her wrathful jabbing elbows.

She grabbed his ear with one hand, and the phone with the other, stopping the recording before she hissed, “Was this your idea?”

“Owowowww, Pidgeeee.” He slurred bemusedly. “Imma pranking Keef.”

She groaned and smacked him upside the head, “You dolt. Can you _not_ read a face?”

“He’s relly good tho’.” Lance said almost sadly, “Iss not nearly funny ’nuf.”

“Of course it’s not _funny_.” She groaned again, and lowered her volume upon realizing Shiro and Allura had noticed her and were waving at her. “You and I will have _Words_ in the morning, Lance.”

He shrugged, not nearly as perturbed as he would be once he realized the results of his scheming. “issokay.”

Pidge would make sure to intensify his eventual guilt hundredfold.

“Hey, Pidgey” Lance turned to her, suddenly looking concerned in a slight waft of clarity. “Is Keef sad?”

She sighed a little, even smiled at Allura’s excited pointing out of how amazing Keith was on stage, Shiro’s indulgent smile, and thought wistfully that her oblivious friends didn’t know the half of it.

* * *

_ “So I can cry for my age, my life and my face, _

_ And I will wash off all the dirty, dirty thoughts I had about you,” _

No, Keith wasn’t going to be that guy.

He wouldn’t skulk in corners, wanting his friends to be unhappy just for his own selfish heart; he liked Allura, he loved _Shiro-_ he would be happy for them if it _killed_ him _._

_ “And I can cry cause I got so much she has not, _

_ And I will wash off all the dirty, dirty thoughts I had about you now;” _

Shiro was more than a fleeting crush, he was everything Keith had ever known; family, best friend, brother, all wrapped into one.

He was too important to risk regardless of Allura.

Keith would be happy for them, and he would smile and bear it, and he _would_ get over this.

_ Wash off all the dirty, dirty thoughts I had about you.” _

It just wasn’t going to be today.

* * *

 

**Author's Note:**

> Comments, kudos, constructive criticism, just plain old fashioned screaming?
> 
> Alternatively, come shout at me [@theincrediblesulkmachine](http://theincrediblesulkmachine.tumblr.com) on tumblr. I'm not actually mean IRL. *awkward laugh*


End file.
